October has been a pretty stressful month for me. I have been working on improving my GPA/DAT (dental admission test) score for about three years. I took classes at Fresno City College for two semesters, and classes through UCD Extension for 2 quarters. In between I applied for Dental school and kept re-taking the DAT. I found out last month that my DAT score was fine, but it was my GPA that was holding me back. I also found out that the courses I took at Fresno City and UCDE weren't enough to be admitted, they lady I spoke to told me I should have gone back to school to get my Masters. This tiny bit of information that the lady gave me was so simple for her to say, but so difficult for me to internalize. It may be that I internalized things too much since ever since then I have been DEEPLY wounded, and I end up crying for no reason all the time.
I have been trying to study for the MCAT now, since apparently it's easier for me to become a DOCTOR in the Caribbean versus a DENTIST in the US. I haven't been putting any effort into studying for this test, mostly since I don't want to move so far, and I feel so hurt about the time I wasted for the past three years. My hubby noticed the changes in my study habits and decided that it was time for a talk.
We went to return a movie on Sunday night and ended up talking in the car for about two hours. My husband (Aman) really wants me to pursue a career in the medical field. He knows how motivated I was in the past, and he knows that if I put my mind to it, I could DO IT! I explained to him the problem was -ME- I am having a hard time putting my mind towards anything. I realized that he is ready to do ANYTHING FOR ME. Move with me to the Caribbean, take care of our baby (if we have one by then), and mostly he thinks he can handle me when my stress levels will be HIGH.
Anyhow, I still haven't made a decision, I am waiting for my body to re-calibrate itself and for me to feel like me again. Once I am myself I will decide what I want to do. I just pray that what ever it is makes us happy. We are planning to have "car therapy" once a week! :)
